AN INEVITABLE QUESTION that all high school students are asked at some point during their last few years in secondary education is, “So, when are you going to get a job?”
But as it turns out, the answer for some may just be never.
That’s right, it’s the Age of the Unemployed Bums, or UBs.
Starting late last year, a social media trend popped up on Instagram and TikTok where users began to censor the word “j*b” or refer to it as the “J-word.” At the same time, clips that treated job applications like horror movie jump scares went viral — likening the idea of getting a job to scenes such as Jack Nicholson’s character in “The Shining,” sticking his head through the ax-chopped door and saying, “Here’s Johnny!”
These online trends may be a product of a real problem with high schoolers getting any monthly income. According to the U.S. Bureau of Labor Statistics, employment among high schoolers nationally went from 30% of them having jobs in 1993 to 22.5% working in 2023, meaning that the rise of unemployed bums may truly be a thing. And California appears to be leading the pack, with the highest jobless rates for teenagers in the country, according to the Pacific Research Institute. To understand why, it’s key to consult the experts who fully encapsulate this new, revolutionary approach: the jobless and proud.
“Being ‘employment-ambiguous’ gives me freedom,” said Noah Bize, an 11th grader at California High School in San Ramon.
Bize is a “self-employed” student between jobs — basically, he isn’t working. But his in-between employment state has allowed him to construct his brilliant thesis on having a job, which he coined “Bize’s Hierarchy of Employment.” This lens will be foundational to understanding the “Bizentine” degrees of bum behavior.
In this hierarchy, Bize considers himself to be a Level III, an individual who has worked before yet can’t find it in their heart to pick up a name tag again.
Bize established the lowest level of the hierarchy, Level I, as the purest form of sloth, characterized by individuals who have never had nor desired employment.
A first-class bum
Although a true Level I unemployed bum (UB) is an apocryphal, mythical figure, years of tireless research have managed to uncover this rare specimen. His name is Antonio Tam, a 12th grader at California High, and he truly is a complex figure to behold.
“I don’t really do anything,” Tam said. “But I also kind of wish I had something to do sometimes.”
Tam rather proudly declared that, although he would likely be a stalwart UB regardless of the recent no-job online movement, the trend isn’t helping.
Tam wanted to expound but had an appointment with lounging under a tree and counting blades of grass.
Among the confounding variables of this fascinating phenomenon are a student’s environment and socioeconomic status. As San Ramon is one of the many sunny, relatively well-to-do suburbs in the Bay Area, many students don’t feel the need to pop in behind a cash register. But there may really be something far more sinister at work: upper-middle-class ennui.
“San Ramon is a pretty wealthy place; a lot of people are very fortunate here,” Bize said. “Fewer people feel the need for a job or need to have a job, which creates a culture where it’s less likely for students to work.”
Too busy studying to work
Tam also agreed that San Ramon’s privilege contributes to some students being disinclined to work. And, to be fair, he explained that this area’s intense academic pressure on students can make working difficult. If you’re not taking all AP classes, staying up ’til the sun rises, and maximizing your caffeine-per-minute intake, you’re not really trying.
“Our area’s academic culture definitely pushes people away from having a job,” Tam said. “It’s hard to manage both school and work.”
This reveals the true complexity of diagnosing a UB. A lesser scholar would dismiss the unemployed mob as lazy, but being unemployed and being a bum are two distinct animals.
Jaeie Kim, a 12th grader at California High, is very much jobless, thank you very much, yet also has several academic responsibilities taking up time that could be spent working. She is employment-curious, making her a Level II.
“During my junior year, I’d have to stay up all night studying,” Kim explained. “Back then, I wouldn’t have had time for a job. I had to be like a machine.”
Kim went on to explain that although she has fewer academic responsibilities this year, she would still find it difficult to balance work and school. But, since she still wants to get some of those sweet green Benjamins for college, she’s considering getting a summer job.
Just looking
But Kim is just one of many who hope to get a job soon. Jordan Lee, a 12th grader at Monte Vista High School in Danville and a fellow Level II, said that even if there’s the will to get that check, part of the unemployment problem is that it’s difficult to find a way.
“Many more people are looking for jobs rather than having jobs,” Lee said. “It’s hard to get a job, especially as some people are more focused on academics. The Bay Area is the only place where being a nerd is cool.”
“It’s hard to get a job, especially as some people are more focused on academics. The Bay Area is the only place where being a nerd is cool.”
Jaeie Kim, Cal High senior
Lee did caution against being all doom and gloom by taking the unemployment trend to heart. Just because people are censoring the word “job” doesn’t mean that the labor market will crash so badly it’ll make Armageddon look like a pizza party.
“Part of the joke, I think, is that people who tend to (spend their time) online aren’t employed,” Lee clarified. “It’s a selection bias.”
So really, this rise of UB is a complex issue that involves socioeconomic, cultural, and personal circumstances. But what of the UB’s mortal enemy? For every yin, there’s a yang. For every fork, there’s a toaster, which means that for every UB, there’s a Level V two-job-having Master of Employment who stands in the way of any jobless man’s dreams.
Finding the confidence to connect
Enter the final boss with a 20-hour workweek, Santino De Las Alas, a 12th grader at California High.
“I really encourage everybody to get a job,” De Las Alas said. “People misjudge how much time they have on their hands. A lot of workplaces understand that you’re a high schooler, they’re not going to have you work a lot.”
Truly, these encouraging words would keep even the most employment-ambiguous individual from sleeping a wink at night. Jobs are scary! What do you mean they’re manageable?
“The best thing I’ve gotten through my job is confidence to talk to people,” De Las Alas said. “Everyone needs to work eventually, and having a job prepares you very well for a working environment, unless you plan to be unemployed for the rest of your life.”
Don’t tempt them. A true UB plans to live in their mom’s basement for the rest of their lives. Confidence? People? Who needs that when one can be a risk-taker by trading crypto and gambling online?
De Las Alas’ work ethic is admirable, and his encouragement for others to work is commendable. He firmly believes in the formative experiences that employment provides, and he uses his pay to support himself. His suggestion to those who struggle to find a job is to intensify the hunt. There was a point in time when he was unemployed and tried to get a job for three months, and look where he is now: day shift at a bakery.
But back to Tam. Apparently, he was wondering if the UB label really represented his people. He’s been brainstorming and has a few new suggestions.
“What do people call me?” Tam wondered aloud. “I like it when people call me a communist, a chud, or better yet, a scholar.”
Benjamin Barba-Zuniga is a 12th grader at California High School in San Ramon, the opinions editor for the school newspaper, The Californian, and a CCYJ reporter. This story originally appeared in CCSpin.